You are not listening

It's a common complaint among adolescents that their parents don't listen; this feeling can have significant consequences for their emotional well-being and the parent-child relationship. 

Listening skills are an art form that must be developed and adjusted to different interactions. At times, when an adolescent speaks, parents' anxiety may rise, and they may feel the need to rescue the child or provide a quick response. In these moments, it's crucial to remember that patience is key. Take a breath, listen, and understand that your child is expressing themselves. 

One of the most potent aspects of listening is the art of staying silent. This silence is not an absence of communication, but a space for trust to flourish. When your child reaches out, your silence can be a potent tool in building a trusting connection. 

At times, it helps to repeat what they say back to give them time to process. This allows the child to explain more about themselves and open up about any doubts they may have. When we listen, we not only hear the words but also understand the emotions behind them. A child's tone of voice can be a powerful indicator of their feelings, and by paying attention to this, we can better understand and empathize with them. 

We also listen to and observe their body language. Hands are also a means of expressing emotions. By paying attention to the non-verbal cues, you can become more observant and empathetic, understanding your child's feelings even when they don't express them verbally. 

The child can develop a sense of isolation when not feeling listened to, and may at times develop negative feelings about themselves if there is not a safe space created for them to express their feeling or sense of self. 

Silence and LIstening are an art to continue developing for us all.